Do they know it´s Christmas ?

I wish for everybody a happy, peacefull, joyfull and glorious Christmas.

M.

You are a force, you are a constant source..

Today the Nobel Peace Prize was handed out to President Barack Obama, in Oslo.
I heard just bits of his speech, but it was very good. A very well written speech. And a very well spoken one. There has been alot of critics against the fact that Obama is the laureate this year.
The word is that he has not been doing enough for world peace, and now he just sent more soldiers to Afghanistan....and so on! The Nobel Peace Prize committee says in they´re justification that Obama get´s this award cause of :
"his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples. The Committee has attached special importance to Obama's vision of and work for a world without nuclear weapons.

Obama has as President created a new climate in international politics. Multilateral diplomacy has regained a central position, with emphasis on the role that the United Nations and other international institutions can play. Dialogue and negotiations are preferred as instruments for resolving even the most difficult international conflicts. The vision of a world free from nuclear arms has powerfully stimulated disarmament and arms control negotiations. Thanks to Obama's initiative, the USA is now playing a more constructive role in meeting the great climatic challenges the world is confronting. Democracy and human rights are to be strengthened.

Only very rarely has a person to the same extent as Obama captured the world's attention and given its people hope for a better future. His diplomacy is founded in the concept that those who are to lead the world must do so on the basis of values and attitudes that are shared by the majority of the world's population."

I think it sounds quite fair then.. ;) And of course, as Obama said himself today during his speech, he believed and was quite sure that there were others that deserved it more than him.
But the thing is now, Obama is this years Peace Prize Winner! And i think he deserved it!

Congratulations to the Nobel Peace Prize winner, Barack Obama.

M.

Both Sides Now

Bows and flows of angel hair and ice cream castles in the air
and feather canyons everywhere, I've looked at cloud that way.
But now they only block the sun, they rain and snow on everyone.
So many things I would have done but clouds got in my way.

I've looked at clouds from both sides now,
from up and down, and still somehow
it's cloud illusions I recall.
I really don't know clouds at all.

Moons and Junes and ferris wheels, the dizzy dancing way you feel
When every fairy tale comes real; I've looked at love that way.
But now it's just another show. You leave 'em laughing when you go
and if you care, don't let them know, don't give yourself away.

I've looked at love from both sides now,
from give and take, and still somehow
it's love's illusions I recall.
I really don't know love at all.

Tears and fears and feeling proud to say "I love you" right out loud,
dreams and schemes and circus crowds, I've looked at life that way.
But now old friends are acting strange, they shake their heads, they say
I've changed.
But Something's lost but something's gained in living every day.

I've looked at life from both sides now,
from win and lose, and still somehow
it's life's illusions I recall.
I really don't know life at all.

I've looked at life from both sides now,
from up and down, and still somehow
it's life's illusions I recall.
I really don't know life at all.

Joni Mitchell




One of the greatest songs ever made. :)

I walk on concrete I walk on sand But I can't find A safe place to stand I'm scared baby I wanna' run This world's crazy Gimme' the gun..

imagine that... i´ve lived here, in this town, for nearly three years now!!!!
I can´t believe it! The time has run out of my hands.... it´s like this wet and slippery piece of soap between my hands.... i can´t get a hold of it!

From time to time... i get so pissed at myself... for actually still staying here! Here, is where i don´t really wanna be... this is not what was ment for me?! Or was it? Is it?
I cannot say that these three years have gone all to waste... cause i´ve got good and wonderful friends, i´ve learned so much through work. I´ve had alot of fun. And then there´s these times when i really live in the basement... and i feel like shit..and i am just cursing myself!
I know that i am the only one that can turn this thing around... to something positive! I am the only one that can pull myself up and away from this city, and on to another... i am the one who has to make the change!
I fell through the floor, and made it down to the basement tonight... i do not know what triggered it.
There is alot of adrenalin and energies going on at work these days... there are interviews with new people.. (our new boss), and there are some of my colleagues having they´re exams these days. And i feel that energy so strong... and i get up and down all the time... when i am there, at work i feel high... and then i hit the floor when i come home. Really fall face down... as Tori says..
I get the feeling and need of doing something new, that i need to leave... i need to go.... but still, here i am! Stuck... it´s hard to pull my foot out...like a big stone fell on it... holding it down!!!

I know that tomorrow i feel better... i just need to moan about these things from time to time... cause i feel so shitty when i feel this way... and.. now i did....

M.

i've got your mind i said she said i've your voice i said you don't need my voice girl you have your own..

I know i haven´t been blogging for a while... my feelings have been up and down from time to time now. I think they are quite stabile now though.

I posted that last song by Tori Amos, cause of a thing that happend...that i didn´t think would happen...not yet anyway! But now it did....
Earlier i have been writing about it... the thing is that my friend would leave her job!
And now she´s really gonna... She got a new job! And it all happend quite fast. Just getting that phrase in my face...was really in my face so to speak! I said earlier to her that what ever she decided i would support her, and of course that´s what i´ve done all the way. And when she got the job, she said yes! And there you go... she´s leaving us...:/ I was really upset the two first days after i got to know it. I dind´t function at all... not at work, and not at home. I crawled back down in the cellar... Kinda stupid you might say...cause she´s not leaving town, she´s just changing jobs. Well...for me it´s a big change! She´s been there since i started... and the last 1,5 years she´s been more than my rock i must say. She´s really been my rock, my rope to hold on to and all....I´ve had alot of support in her. So loosing her will be really sad, and very weird. But... that won´t happen yet.. She needs to work her time out there, so maybe she´ll leave just before Christmas.

Now i am quite fine about it all... It still makes me sad thinking about it, but i am supporting her in her decision...to the fullest! I know now what made me really upset and sad was the fear of loosing her... that we would not be able to stay in touch! Yes i know that this town is not big at all, really... but still, one can easily loose contact with someone if we just let it happen... and often we do! We always say that we will stay in touch...we will visit, we´ll drink coffee at the cafe..., we´ll do this and that... and the first 6 months we will...but it will be less as each month passes...sadly! I am always quite determinded that this time we´ll manage to stay in touch!
But we never do...

I am hoping so badly that this thing won´t happen to us! I need to have this person in my life.. i love having chats with her, about all and nothing... and i need to be able to take a coffee now and then with her...maybe even a party... or whatever. Just knowing that she´s nearby...and not lost. If that day comes... when she is... i need to leave...

I am quite a pessimist about these things... cause i have been there so many times. I´ve lost so many good and close friends on the way. Is it supposed to be like that? Is this what life´s all about? Letting people pass through your life... as if we we´re all on a train...some people steps off...and some people stay... but not for long anyway....they never do...


M.

1000 oceans

these tears i've cried
i've cried 1000 oceans
and if it seems i'm
floating. in the darkness

well, i can't believe
that i would keep
keep you from flying
and i would cry 1000 more
if that's what it takes
to sail you home
sail you home
sail you home

i'm aware what the rules are
but you know that i will run
you know that i will follow you
over silbury hill
through the solar field
you know that i will follow you

and if i find you
will you. still remember
playing at the trains
or does this
little blue ball
just fade away

over silbury hill
through the solar field
you know that i will follow you
i'm aware what the rules are
but you know that i will run
you know that i will follow you

these tears i've cried
i've cried
1000 oceans
and if it seems i'm
floating
in the darkness

well, i can't believe
that i would keep
keep you from flying
so, i will cry
1000 more
if that's what it takes
to sail you home
sail you home
sail you home
sail..
sail you home

-Tori Amos-

© Sword & Stone

(I let Tori explain what my feelings are for today.....M. )

oh god....

I am bedazzled by Colin Firth.... just saw an interview with him on the english program Parkinson... wow... he´s even more handsome and funny in real life than in movies... ;)) i´m just sayin´....

M.